I came across this list online — A Working List of Every Single Thing that Jack White Dislikes.
The list includes Katy Perry, The Black Keys, baseball and cell phones.
Jack White is a little on the curmudgeon side, but we all have things we don’t like, so I made my own list.
Date of hate: Since birth.
The charge: They nasty.
The deets: I remember one instance. It was lunchtime at the terrible daycare centre I went to. If my memory serves me correctly, one of the women there MADE ME eat a giant mushroom. Ugh, gag me with a spoon.
The weird thing about this is that, while I despise mushrooms, I really love truffle oil.
2. Shows about dumb people having kids, ie: Teen Mom and 19 Kids and Counting.
Date of hate: Since ’08.
The charge: Too many kids will grow up on TV, and I feel like that could be a bad thing. Just a hunch.
The deets: Never actually watched a full episode of either, and did you know there have been, like 9 seasons of the Duggars on television? Sure, they seem like kind, law-abiding people, but give me a break! I watch a lot of really dumb TV, but at least those people have stopped recreating. It’s hard to carry a child when you’re tits up in the pinot grigio week after week.
3. Slow ass computers.
Date of hate: The 90s.
The charge: fdkjkleriefnawla;d;w
The deets: As I write this, my computer is chug-chugging along at a snail’s pace. Now I know this is a super first world problem, but I come from a time when A) there were no computers, and B) when there were computers, they were the size of a refrigerator box and required the use of the ONLY PHONE in the house to get on the internet. And there wasn’t even as much on the internet back then!
It was basically this:
Now it’s your turn. What are three things you hate?
For more on Jack White’s list, head over to Mic.